Most of us have Suffered the anguish and pain of school or college
Romance. We somehow generally and often erroneously associate love with only the
opposite sex. We often think of love a something we 'fall into'. If we are
lucky and if the right person comes along. Like the artist who wants to paint and is
waiting for the right object.
We need to realize that to love is an art.
It needs conscious effort and dedication. For most of us the problem becomes
one of being loved rather than of loving. We often forget that we have to take an
active part too. This is where our egos hamper us. We are the center of our
won little world and expect others to conform to what we want. The act of loving is
dramatically opposite to this. The most active ingredient in the act of loving lies
in the act of giving. A mature person experiences joy in the act of giving.
The most important realm on which we can give to another
is on the psychological - we can give to another our understanding, our knowledge, our
patience, our caring, our time - in fact a part of ourselves. In this way we enrich
each other and bring joy. The key lies in giving wholeheartedly without expecting
anything in return.
This leads of another important attitude in the act of
loving. That of acceptance of another human being: a wholehearted acceptance of
another person as he or she is. For this it is essential to go beyond our
"I" world and the demands and expectations that go with it.
Loving also implies focus and attention, in relation to
another persons needs and wants. It means the ability to listen to opposed to
hearing. We have to learn to listen to the feeling and the emotions in the other,
not just the content of what he is saying, but going beyond and understanding what
he is not saying or meaning.
The very foundation stone of these concepts is faith.
Faith is our own capacity to love whole heartedly. FAITH IN A HUMAN BEING'S